The Passing of Very Different Men...

My dad will be passing away in the next few hours. It is strange and unsettling because I live 1100 miles away from him. I’ve been trying to think of good times with him, and they just don’t seem to come. I try to think of good things he did. I know he made a little hutch for me when I was 3 or 4. He made a teeter-totter airplane for one of my brothers. He took us mushroom hunting (an Iowa thing, I think). We went on camping trips to Lake Okoboji. The really sad thing is that I don’t remember him being part of those times. I know he was there, but there were no warm feelings, no caring, no love that comes from any memories of him. If it wasn’t for my mother, all of us—my brothers and sisters and I—could have been as sad as my dad. There are a thousand or more things I could say to show he had a pitiful life at the end, circumstances that led him to the way he was.

 

There were good times for him. He had seven kids. I hope we gave him some joy, even if it was overwhelmingly difficult to give him any at the end of his life. I know God was trying to get his attention many times, yet do not know if he really paid any attention to it. He told me he prayed all the time. I pray it is true. My last words to him were that of asking for forgiveness for not calling him and begging him to turn to Jesus, asking for forgiveness. I won’t know until heaven if it made any difference. I have to hold onto hope that it did. It is really, really sad that no one will miss him. Not even his grandkids want to see him. There is serious talk about not even having any kind of memorial for him. There needs to be something. Anything. Doesn’t everyone need that—I didn’t say deserve, but need?

 

My hubby’s father passed away a few months ago. The scene was totally different. He had all of his grandkids around him when he died. They prayed for him and sang to him. The love was so thick surrounding him, showing him how much he would be missed, and he is. There were many, many people at his funeral. He had a very good life and he knew it.

 

It is doubtful there will be a dozen at my dad’s funeral—if he has one. That includes 7 kids, 5 in-laws, 8 grandkids, 1 sister, 5 or 6 nieces and nephews with their spouses & kids. I pray that I will never be like my earthly father in so many ways. How we deal with the situation now is still up in the air.  Perhaps, just maybe, God will be able to use this to bring more people to Him…

I just need to nag more!

According to my hubby, I need to nag more. I need to nag him to go to bed earlier (among other things!)… I think I am married to the most incredible man. He is absolutely perfect for me…though I know he wouldn’t be perfect for someone else. When I think of a high maintenance woman, I think of the money she spends. He thinks of the extra time he has to spend on her, coddling her, praising her—even when he doesn’t feel like it. That’s probably why he likes me; he doesn’t have to do too much extra. Since we married in our late 30’s (oops…he turned 40 the week before we were married)…we were kinda set in our own ways. It is hard to believe that it was almost 10 years ago that we met face to face for the first time…I drove my co-workers crazy by counting down the hours until we met on post-it notes and placing them on other’s desks until my last hour of working until I left.

 

I was reminded of this because I found out that my sweetie coined the term “red flag”. That’s right. Straight from his mouth to my ears to around the world. Wait…does that mean I talk too much??? Just a caution for all those out there who even think about getting married—pray for red flags. God will give you many red flags if this is not the person for you. I didn’t have any. None. It was incredible. But then again, my sweetie is incredible also!

Silly

It was 10 years and a few weeks ago that I received my first email from this strange man from who new where…there was no info on him at all. He just wrote “You sound interesting. Tell me more about yourself.” Now as our 10^th anniversary is coming in November, I was just reminded of how much he makes my heart smile with silly, little things.  I was carrying a cup of coffee to my desk, past the frig, when he bumped into me, almost spilling it. I believe the conversation went like this…

 

“Watch out”

“I didn’t know you were going to bump into me”

“I thought it was the other way around”

“Well, you forgot to put your blinkers on”

 

Hmmm….didn’t know I had blinkers!! It’s amazing how traffic can back up in a two person home!